The Little ATV That Couldn't (A Cautionary Tale)

ONCE UPON A TIME...There lived three girls (Yours truly, Snow White, and Schooley) who traveled to the far away, magical place of Monroe. Monroe was in the country side, you see, and they desperately wanted to escape the fabulous life of the city to go on an ADVENTURE.
This time, an ADVENTURE meant switching from the safe confines of their car, to the not-so-safe confines of an ATV. The not-so-safe part meant that their adventure was sure to be extremely fun an magical! Like riding a T-Rex over a double rainbow! WOAH.
So they all piled on the back of the 1984 ATV, and were off to explore the land!
Schooley, who had experience in ATVing, took the reins, and started the vehicle."Rr-r-r-r-r. Rr-r-r-r-r. Rr-r-r-r-r-rVRRRROOOOMMMM" Said the ATV!The girls laughed. The ATV was so funny! So they rode off into the sunset, and besides the occasional bug that stuck their smiling faces, the trip was as smooth as Nutella.
Until...
They went to see the miniature unicorns a mile or so down from the Palace, on the Main Road. The Main Road was different than the Back Road the girls were previously riding on. Sure, they met an occasional automobile, but they would get to the side of the road, no problem. "Rrrrrr-r-r-rm." Said the ATV, so Schooley pulled over to a neighboring castle to give the poor little ATV a break."How long do we have to wait?" Said Snow White."Until the ATV is good and ready. Shouldn't take long, eh?"The ATV was silent. The girls waited, and waited, and waited some more. Finally, the girls noticed the guards looking at them through the stained glass windows, so they decided to get going. Schooley attempted to start the ATV."Vrr-r-r-r-r. Vrr-r-r-r-r. Vr-Vr-Vr-Vr-Vr""Oh no!" The girls exclaimed.Schooley tried again, but the ATV refused to move.

The girls looked at each other, and knew they were doomed.

"Come on! You can do it! I BELIEVE in you!" I said, as Schooley attempted to start the engine up.

"Vr-r-r-r-r-r." was the last thing the little ATV could say, before it succumbed to it's own personal illness.

The girls sat there for a minute.

"Well, this sucks." said Snow White.

The only option was to push the ATV all the way home.

The girls learned a valuable lesson that day.

The Moral? Depression wins. Every. Single. Time. Just give up, because no matter how hard you try, it will never be good enough. You are doomed to fail.

And they lived happily ever after!